Our failures in getting everything done are not due to a lack of resources or time. It is not a lack of creativity or focus. The real reason we are unable to attain change is much more intangible than that. It is a hard truth to hear. Today I am challenging you to dig really deep and look closely at what has really been holding you back from getting everything done.
Listen below for the entire episode on The Systemize Your Life Podcast
The Core of the Problem in Not Getting Everything Done
Why haven’t you started those 12 weeks of clean eating? The 12 weeks on a budget? Those 4 weeks on a new morning routine? That new mom workout group at the park? The new class at the gym that you don’t feel good enough for? Why haven’t you taken that online class? Why haven’t you done the things?
Yes, you do need time and money. But it is more than that. Money comes and goes. Every single day is filled with a new 24 hours. Countless choices you’ve made each day over the years have gotten you to where you are today. One part of that equation has gotten you extremely stuck.
The truth of the matter is that everything that you’re experiencing and facing comes down to you. Only you. Not the time, money, or resources. Not the energy or support. It’s not any of that, but rather, your ability to trust yourself.
I have carefully crafted today’s blog post on getting everything done to help you answer the question of whether or not you can trust yourself.
Time Management Bootcamp
Before I dive into the reason why you aren’t getting everything done, I need to share something huge with you. If you’ve been listening in to my podcast, you know that my first ever live training is happening this week. It is 100% free and will knock 90-95% of the things off your to-do list. It is my Time Management Bootcamp.
Three full days of coaching and education on everything time management. It will help you squash your to do list and create a schedule that works once and for all. I’m going to help you automate your to-do lists so that you can stop scratching them down onto random pieces of paper that you can’t even find.
Then we will tackle your clutter so you can finally live mess-free and figure out how to keep up with your housework. You can stop making it the bore and the chore that it doesn’t have to be.
I am just SO unbelievably excited. There are already almost a thousand women signed up for this!! What! Please come on over, sign up, and then join us in the Time Management Bootcamp Facebook group. I really want to see you there!
Do you trust yourself?
That is the question we are asking today: do you trust yourself?
What kind of track record do you have with the decisions that you make in your life?
How many times have you had conversations with yourself and never circled back to them?
How often have you told yourself you were going to do something and never followed through?
Do you trust yourself?
Do the Work
Your homework today is to sit down with a pen and paper and answer the question of whether or not you trust yourself. Sit down and write it. Big and at the top of the page, girl! You can write a big fat “no” beside it! But answer the question.
Do I trust that I will allow myself to struggle, fail, disappoint myself and others through the commitment, and keep going anyway? If you need to do this in the car line at school or sneak into your closet for 30 minutes to answer this question, do it! I don’t care how you find the time to do it, just take action. It is a huge turning point.
Face this truth that you have ignored for so long. Face it in a deep, hardcore way. Without your kids, your husband, or your phone. Please, don’t bring your phone. She doesn’t belong there. Just be still.
Asking yourself a question in stillness, and allowing yourself to answer, is magic. You will hear answers that you were purposefully making yourself too busy to hear for a long, long time.
“Trusting yourself does not mean you hustle harder. Trusting yourself means you know when to slow down and when to lay into it. You develop a relationship with yourself that allows you to stop the grind and to get organized. You can show up each day the way that you need to and want to. Little by little, you can learn how you need to show up each day. It won’t happen all at once, but little by little you will learn to trust yourself.”
Rising from the Ashes
While time, energy, and money are very involved in our ability to make progress on our goals, many people rise above them. How do so many people rise from the ashes and make massive change in their lives? Everyone starts with nothing in one way or another.
I started with nothing. Surrounded by massive fears and uncertain of how I was going to afford a podcast microphone. I was sharing a laptop with my husband. No money or credit to my name, with a baby on my hip, bruised and broken, I started what I have become today. I am here because I started. I took a chance on myself. Because I said yes.
That is what you must do. Everyone who rose up from the ashes, came up from nothing, and made something of themselves worked hard and refused to make excuses. They trusted themselves.
This week, I’m doing a huge bootcamp. I’ve never done one of those before and I am so lit up about it, but also terrified. In the past, I’ve gotten on a stage in front of thousands of people and told them about my personal home management system. Not comfortable at all. Terrifying!
I leave all of my comforts: my house, my bed, my food, my kids, my husband. I work my tail off to battle through so many obstacles. And it works every time because I trust myself!
How did I reach this point after making decisions for over a decade that left me broken, rotten, and empty inside? I started, worked my tail off, and trusted myself.
How You Can Get There, Too
1. Answer that question.
Write that letter. Answer the question of whether or not you trust yourself and anwer it thoughtfully, intentionally. I literally journaled for every day of my life for 20 years and it made me who I am today. It will change your life and its free!
Do that thing you’ve been putting off. Join the group, join the program. Say yes to the thing that you have been thinking about for days, weeks, or years of your life. Do it alone. You don’t need your friend or your husband or anything.
Do it afraid, learn your heart out, and just start. Learning to trust yourself starts very slow and happens over time. The first the thing you say yes to feels like you are jumping from one side of the Grand Canyon to the other side. It feels fast and scary, but you don’t have to become everything all at once.
Make it your goal to show up and prove to yourself little by little that you can change and grow. Doing this work and making this change for other people does not work. It must be your desire, your passion, your dream, your purpose. It can be something as small as learning to cook chicken without burning it.
You can’t give up on yourself, you must try again. When you try and it doesn’t work, the next day you get up and try again. At some point you will feel alone in your growth. And you have to trust that you will rise from the ashes. And the dirty dishes.
You do that with one small yes today. And again tomorrow. And again next week. You will build the strongest relationship with yourself that you have ever had. Confidence and trust in your ability will come from no one but you, friend. No one but you.
Where Your Trust Is Rooted
For years I looked for this confidence in everything else. Then I realized that I have to do this on my own and is how I’ve been able to show up over and over again. Now I know that I can trust myself. That when I say yes to something, I am going to do it and I am really careful about what I say yes to.
My cautiousness in committing to do something is not about what it looks like on the outside when I don’t follow through. It isn’t about disappointing my husband, my family, or my bank account, but it is about breaking trust with myself. It’s about being unbelievably confident in your ability to show up even when it stinks, when it’s hard, and when it’s lousy.
Trusting yourself does not mean you hustle harder. Trusting yourself means you know when to slow down and when to lay into it. You develop a relationship with yourself that allows you to stop the grind and to get organized. You can show up each day the way that you need to and want to. Little by little, you can learn how you need to show up each day. It won’t happen all at once, but little by little you will learn to trust yourself.
Go Get It!
Go ask yourself those questions. Come share them with me! You are well on your way to getting everything done. If you’re in our Time Management Bootcamp, share your answers there in that Facebook group. If you’re in our general Systemize Your Life Facebook group, we are still there to totally support you.
Frequently Asked Questions
I am reading this after the Time Management Bootcamp has ended. What resources are available to me to help me progress further in trusting myself?
I am so glad you asked! Have you checked out my Fundamental Needs Workbook? It will help you identify the parts of your life that have to get done, enabling you to get in a place where you can rebuild your trust in yourself. Furthermore, check out the Systemize Your Life Facebook group. I am always there to provide support, accountability, and resources on your journey towards trusting yourself.