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Routines That Can Change Your Life

routines to change your life

June 3, 2024

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I sat down with longtime Systemize Your Life student, Heather Miller, to talk about the routines that can change your life. Every time we have a guest on this show, I am blown away by the incredible women in the Systemize Your Life community.

Systems are a game changer in your motherhood, marriage, and life. Today, we’re diving deep into the nitty-gritty of bedtimes, afternoon routines, and all those moments with kids running around.

We all know the struggle of trying to be everything to everyone and how that affects us over time. I won’t say more—let’s dive into my conversation with amazing mama, Heather Miller.

Listen Below For The Entire Episode On The Systemize Your Life Podcast

Meet Heather Miller

Married for ten years and a mother of three (ages 8, 6, and 3), Heather’s journey started when she got married at 29 and immediately began growing her family. “It’s busy,” she says, managing both the home and their hectic schedule. With her husband working as a chemical engineer, his demanding job often keeps him out of the house, but they feel blessed by his role.

In addition to her family responsibilities, Heather also runs a business that she never thought she needed but now finds “very rewarding.” This business stemmed from a crafting book her late grandmother gave her, and working on it brings her closer to her grandmother’s memory. The idea to sell her creations came from her kids, and now The Pleasant Buttercup offers custom polymer clay earrings.

Creative Freedom Through Systems

Heather has been diligently learning to implement systems in her life and I wanted to chat with her to hear about the significant changes these systems have brought to her home. Most prominently, the routine that changed her life the most was the ability to put something creative out into the world, all thanks to the systems she’s put in place.

The routines she’s established for her kids have been incredible. Inside the Systemize Your Life community, we share the systems that work best for us. It’s an amazing community that encourages everyone to acknowledge their accomplishments, get inspired, and cheer each other on.

The Call To Lead Your Home To Greatness

Heather took a leap of faith and embraced the need for change in her home.

Life was hectic. Heather was praying and felt called to get her home life in order. She didn’t know exactly why, but she knew she had to start preparing. She began searching for solutions. Unhealthy in body and mind, Heather could see her unhappiness affecting her kids. The nagging need to improve kept her searching far and wide. She tried DIY methods to organize her home life, but nothing brought lasting results.

Then, her husband, a chemical engineer, suggested she join Systemize Your Life. His analytical mind helped her see the potential in the program. Everything clicked. Heather says, “Chelsi really understands what’s on a mother’s plate, especially a mother that is called for more.”

The content was designed to be learned in small chunks, fitting into the cracks of time she had available. Heather, who was always caring for her kids, felt her love for learning starting to fade. She needed a direct, supportive, and subject-oriented approach to help her fulfill her dreams of improving her home life.

“The shift happens when we realize we are leaders, not servants in our home.”

Overwhelmed To Organized

Heather admits there are still areas she gets caught up in, but the atmosphere in her home is so much lighter now. There’s less stress and overwhelm. She used to feel like she was constantly operating in fight-or-flight mode. Of course, things still happen, but they’re so much more manageable because the systems are set up. Mornings, afternoons, and bedtimes now have a framework that everyone can follow. When disruptions occur, she can fall back on the routines. She no longer feels like she’s putting out fires all the time.

Sometimes our kids throw wrenches in our plans. They get sick, or life happens. We move, someone passes away, or we get a puppy. All the unpredictability is manageable when your life isn’t a constant blaze you’re trying to extinguish. With a predictable way of functioning, you can handle it all.

Every time I have someone on the show, I never know exactly what they’re going to say, but Heather truly understands the mission. She shares and trusts the process. I love watching women rise. Heather figured out how to make it happen. You don’t have to sacrifice yourself for your family. You can have both; you should have both so you can show up as a whole human.

Mom’s Desire For More

Sometimes, when moms express a desire for more, it strikes a chord with those watching from the sidelines. We were never meant to be “only” moms and wives—we are holistic beings. Even what you might think is a small business can bring immense joy to your life and to those who enjoy your creations, like those fun earrings. It’s not just about adding satisfaction for the mother; it enables us to be the mothers we aspire to be. This is such an important conversation because figuring out how to manage all the things we deal with regularly leaves room for us to thrive.

If you’re faith-based, Proverbs 31 is the verse I lean on. It speaks to every facet of a woman’s life and gives us the fuel and confidence we need. Society often puts us in a box, defining what motherhood is supposed to look like. We enter this incredibly selfless season of life when we are pregnant and nursing, and it can be hard to break out of that mindset as our kids grow older. Growing, birthing, and nursing a baby is demanding at all hours of the day, but it’s not meant to be like that forever.

The shift happens when we realize we are leaders, not just servants, in our homes. When our kids reach around two years old, they can start taking on responsibilities, like taking their plates to the sink.

It takes time as a mom to see how all the gears interlock and work together throughout the day. It’s an amazing skill with many moving parts. Heather used this skill set to craft her routines with her kids, creating a smoother, more fulfilling home life.

Lack Of Systems, Lack Of Confidence

Heather’s morning routine used to be a mess. Of course, part of that can be attributed to having young kids, but every morning felt like she “was already behind.” There was hustle, but no flow or focus. Heather tried to reign everything in, but she operated in the same chaotic way. She didn’t have a set routine for her mornings, leading to many tardies. She was gaining weight and didn’t feel like she was winning at mom life.

But Heather knew she could do big things. She knew routines could change her life. Simple advice like “get up earlier,” “plan at night to make the next day go smoother,” and “have a quiet time plan” made a big difference for her.

Heather used to be a nurse and understands the importance of assessment. She admittedly has an ADHD diagnosis but knew she had discipline and focus. Home life management was a new idea for her. She started by asking herself, “What is getting in the way in the morning?” She taught her kids the BBC system—beds, blinds, and clothes. She questioned, “Why am I helping my kids get dressed?”

By implementing these systems, Heather transformed her chaotic mornings into a more manageable and fulfilling routine. She taught her kids responsibility and found her own sense of peace and order in the process.

Routines That Can Change Your Life

Now, her kids—ages 8, 6, and almost 4—can prepare for the day ahead. They take ownership of what they need, like snacks, water, and clothes. It’s a game-changer when you’re not running around like a tornado while they lounge on the couch.

Heather shared a recent example from a birthday party where one of her boys noticed the trash was full and took it out without being asked. Now, dinners go seamlessly because everyone knows their job at mealtime. Her husband has benefited too, as the routine is easy, orderly, and less chaotic.

Heather doesn’t want to waste time anymore; she feels it’s disrespectful to her family. It’s about taking the job seriously in every role you take on—wife, mom, CEO, taking care of your body. If you say yes to a job, you show up for it. You’d never waste company time, so why treat motherhood any differently? Folding laundry isn’t mundane; it’s not just another chore on the to-do list. It’s something you get to do because you’ve been blessed with a family.

The Best Gift You Could Ever Give Your Kids

I could never have imagined how this work would transform other people’s homes. I truly believe your kids will have a leg-up in the world if you give them the gift of presence. They notice. They help. Teaching kids to have their eyes up is paramount. You ask, “How can I be helpful?” before you sit down. They will assert themselves to be helpful because they’ll know how good it feels to be in service and part of a team. The impact on a family is profound. It’s the best gift you could ever give your children.

Intentionality Springs From a Solid Framework

Heather grew up in a chaotic home, and she understands its effects deeply. She knows why certain moments were triggering for her, and she realized she needed to reduce those major stressors to lower her triggers, so she wouldn’t feel so frantic and stressed. She used to react strongly when things went wrong, and that’s not how she wanted to show up. Thankfully, there’s so much less of that now. If it does happen, she can talk it through with her children. The structure and framework have given her that freedom.

She can step back when she needs to and be fully present with her kids when that’s necessary. She’s having many more heartfelt conversations with her children and is able to answer those big questions they have because she has the time. It’s exciting to think about her kids’ futures. Kids are always listening, and it’s positively affecting their family dynamic. Heather encourages her kids to feel their feelings.

With kids, every day is an opportunity. By implementing systems, things can come together quickly. Heather is a true testament to what’s possible when you prioritize organization and intentionality in family life.

Everyday Is An Opportunity

You can have a transformation like Heather’s in your own home. Make time for work, creative pursuits, fitness and date nights. You can lead your family with intentionality and purpose and open up those big conversations. Big changes are before you and I cannot wait to talk to you after implementing these life-changing systems and family routines. Then come back and share your progress with me in the Systemize Your Life facebook community!

If you’re feeling the pull to step into a calmer, more productive and more joyful home life, check out 3 Essential Summer Organization Tips: Balancing Work And Family, Empowering Children: Transforming Household Chores Into Growth Opportunities and Empowering Your Mindset: Practical Steps For Mompreneurs To Conquer Daily Challenges. Let’s change your motherhood and life for the better!

systems for motherhood

Frequently Asked Questions

What changes can I expect in my home if I become a student in Systemize Your Life?

With systems in place, you can expect a significant improvement in your home’s atmosphere. Your current frantic mornings will be replaced with structured routines, bringing about a sense of calm and order. You’ll navigate disruptions with ease, relying on established frameworks for mornings, afternoons, and bedtime. This newfound organization will not only reduce stress but also foster deeper connections and heartfelt conversations with your children. I hope to see you inside Systemize Your Life!

routines that will change your life
routines that will change your life

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