The moment you step foot into new territory you open yourself up to the world of “what if” and uncertainty. You find yourself immediately working through fear gremlins, especially while chasing big goals. It is human nature to experience fear when walking in uncharted territory. We are designed to stay SAFE.
But, safe doesn’t accomplish missions. Safe doesn’t know about your dreams and goals. Staying safe is surviving, not thriving. This late-night post is a heartfelt, non-system talk about working through my own fear gremlins. My own personal fears of growing into my own new skin.
There have been some incredible adventures in this last quarter for Chelsijo.co. What I really want you to know as I venture down the path is that I too have plenty of fears to work through. Your kindness, graciousness, and courage shine light in our community. For that I am grateful.
It’s not often that I come on here with no specific system in mind to allow me to get to know you, and you to know me just a little bit better. So, grab a cup of hot coffee….or a hot cup of tea and cozy up for a rare kind of post. It’s just you and me, let’s dive in.
Listen below for the entire episode on The Systemize Your Life Podcast
Importance Of Meaningful Connections
Connections are so important and I have to say that I love it so much when you guys go over on Instagram to send me a message that you think I’m funny. Or you appreciate the information that I’m giving you. I also love it when I send out emails and you guys know that it’s truly me sitting behind my laptop typing away. Sending that email, connecting with you, and pouring my heart and energy into my blog, podcast, and business. Even though we are so separated by time and space and distance.
It’s so incredibly important and meaningful to me when someone takes the time to connect back with me after I reach out. That makes me fall in love with the work that they do and the mission that they have. And If you are on my email list, you may remember an email I sent out a while back asking if you knew my fear gremlins. I really poured out my deepest fears and let you in on something that had been going on with me in my journey through Chelsijo.co.
Working Through Fear of Change
I had a lot of things surface for me, as we all do when we venture into a space of new things and work through fear. May that be something that you’re working through in motherhood, business, or your marriage. It’s hard to change.
It’s hard to grow out of the comfortable skin that you’re in, as I imagine an uncomfortable molting reptile. And when I really think about it, that’s what I feel like I’m doing. I feel like I’m actually growing and molting into a new me.
There are some incredible things in the pipeline for Chelsijo.co and Chelsijo.co is me. Everything that happens in my business is because of what I feel I’m being called to do. So it’s my decisions, my execution, and my time. My time away from my family.
It’s also my commitment to my mission. My enthusiasm and my energy for you. It’s all of those things so I work through the fear gremlins. And I get to a place where I feel really good about what I’m doing. I’m sure you do too with whatever it is that you’re venturing into.
Then you get a new idea and you do this new thing along with all the work that it’s going to take to get there. And sometimes it’s in the quiet spaces that those little fear gremlins come out. And it’s Halloweenish. I remember being terrified of that movie back when I was a kid. When we would watch the Gremlins I specifically remember holding a pillow over my face the entire time.
And that is what these fear gremlins are in my mind. They’re like these little teeny tiny, pointy ears, sharp teeth things and are vicious. They attack when you’re not looking.
The Next Level
I decided to pour my heart into this post because the truth and reality of this journey with motherhood and business are really scary. Especially when we come into contact with a new level, there are moments when we will have to work through fear.
It’s kind of like rock climbing or long-distance running. No matter how prepared I was or thought I was, I was always nervous beforehand. I knew that I was about to push myself through something that was going to be hard, but totally worth it. And there is definitely a lot of mental preparation and possible skill learning to go on to that next level.
It’s scary doing something new, no matter what it is that we’re trying to tackle. There has been so much that has been popping up for me, just thinking about everything for Chelsijo.co. I either stay focused and work on my goals for the end of the year. Or I have found myself feeling completely ok with just sitting in my comfy zone and saying it’s been a fantastic year. There has been a lot of growth and momentum. But then I think about how I will feel looking back at this last quarter realizing that I chose not to go for the next level because it was scary.
I know I will be super disappointed with myself and that is not something that I’m comfortable living with. So for me, to get to where I want to go, there is really no way around it. You just have to go right through your fear gremlins and work through the fear.
Getting Past The Fear Gremlins
I am so glad that you guys are going through this season with me, it’s so meaningful. I truly feel that we have built a community that really cares about the work I am doing and the work that you are doing.
And why I am hopping on here to share a different kind of post, one that I do not do very often because I like tangible, tactical, and practical everyday stuff. I really want you to know that there are days when my gremlins tell me that I don’t have enough experience in motherhood. I don’t have enough children. My family isn’t perfect enough for me to set out on this mission to change the culture of motherhood and work. I have a broken family and shared parenting which disqualifies me from doing my work. Or even that my momentum and success have been a total fluke.
I could tell you so many times that my gremlins have found me in the dark parts of the night, literally. Those fear gremlins are trying to tell me things that I know are not true. And I know these gremlins find you as well.
Finding Your Circle Of Mentors
So, I really want you to know how I have been working through fear. That I have learned from some incredible mentors. Surrounded myself with really positive and whole influencers on Instagram, may that be someone with 500 followers or 500,000 followers. Whoever it is that I have in my social media circle. I consider them to be a good influence on me. And this shapes the way that I think about myself, my company, and my motherhood.
This is important for you to know. Whoever it is that you listen to in your podcasts. Or that you are watching through Instagram, tv, your reels, TikTok, or whatever social platform you’re on. It is incredibly important that you are scrutinizing who you let into your circle and what your circle looks like.
All of those connections are very important and can help you with how you are working through fear. You are so connected with the future of who you are right now, today. Whatever you’re absorbing in your environment affects what that future is going to look like. And when we are connecting with our future, before it’s ever even happened, what really matters is the process of getting there.
Chasing Your Goals
We get so consumed with what we think is the most important part of whatever we’re working towards, the income that we make, or the goals that we reach. And yes I understand when you train really hard for say a half marathon, you’re incredibly tied to the outcome of beating a specific time that you have in mind. Or even just completing the entire race.
Of course, you’re tied to that outcome because it’s a goal. And of course, whenever you train really hard, you want to level up. Those things are important, but we need to be working through fear as well.
Whenever you get overwhelmed and bogged down by all of those little details, you’re truly trying to control things that are out of your control. Instead of just being present in the journey that you’re in, showing up, and focusing on where it is you’re supposed to be every day. That’s when those fear gremlins come in and wreak havoc on your thoughts.
Surrender To The Process
So, although I know it may be really hard to just let go and surrender to the process of allowing the future to unfold as it may. It truly is the only place where fear cannot live. You honestly take away the oxygen that fear breathes when you live in the moment that you’re in. If you’re not thinking about the “what if’s,” then there is nowhere left for fear to live. If you are living in the now, right here today, you can be safe, happy, and whole. There is nowhere for those gremlins to pop up.
“I know it may be really hard to just let go and surrender to the process of allowing the future to unfold as it may. It truly is the only place where fear cannot live. You honestly take away the oxygen that fear breathes when you live in the moment that you’re in.”
I’ve been working through fear of living in the future of “what if’s” a lot. What if plan A doesn’t go accordingly? I have plans for my company and for my time, what if they end up being a complete waste? And what if nobody likes it or does this? And then I start thinking of what I can do to change that outcome. What can I do to make that outcome more like the way that I want it?
The process of becoming is truly living with joy, happiness, and gratitude for the journey that you’re on in this very very moment.
Do you remember in the Gremlins movie, the one thing that they absolutely hated? They hated light. They’d say, bright light, bright light, bright light, and they’d turn around and run. Those gremlins loved living in the darkness. What I want for you to know is that you need to live in the light of today because fear has no place there and neither do its little gremlins.
So I’m thinking of you working through fear this weekend and I am unplugging. If you are not unplugging from social media on the weekends, hop on the bandwagon because it is absolutely amazing.
Until next time here is to shining a light onto all of those little gremlins. For more tips on getting a hold of your fears, check out Chelsi’s blog post 3 Ways to Gain Confidence and Step Out of Fear. And if you need more support working through your gremlins head over to The Systemize Your Life Facebook Group, we would love to have you!