I think we can all agree that when you have a night of very little sleep, the next day does not go well. It doesn’t go well for you or the kids and it leaves you feeling rather cranky. So many moms say they’re exhausted at the end of the day, but they can’t help but stay late, because it’s the only time they get to themselves. This sets up a horrible domino effect for everything that happens the very next day. Getting up late is the number one worst way to start your day, and it all starts with what time you get to bed the night before. The problem is making that happen is really, really hard. This is where a bedtime routine for moms plays an essential role in setting you up for success.
Listen below for the entire episode on The Systemize Your Life Podcast
The Importance of a Solid Bedtime Routine for Moms
What I know to be true is that a solid bedtime routine for moms is key. I’ve identified what has made me unbelievably addicted to my bedtime routine, so that I can stick to it more times than not.
There are three tiny key spaces within my house which have been set up to help draw me in at bedtime.
There are times when I’m great at maintaining this routine, and then there are other times where I’m not. My husband, Blaine, is on the same page as me in this regard. This has been important to me for a long time. Even when I was a single mom, and throughout most of my life, the one thing I truly desired was to go to bed and wake up at the same time as my husband. After many years of not being able to have that I knew that it was really, really important.
Balancing Bedtime Routine Priorities
However, sometimes it’s just not possible. Sometimes I have to stay up late and work because things didn’t go well with my work block that day, and I have to get things done. So we have to go our separate ways for a while. He gets to have some free and alone time, and so do I.
Then there are other times when all we want to do is just hang out together watching CrossFit videos on YouTube or enjoying a documentary on Netflix. We love it, but recently, we realized that we don’t want to make it an everyday habit. We’ve recommitted ourselves to honestly managing our time blocks better.
Getting to Bed on Time
Blaine has just started doing my five block method so It’s still pretty fresh and new for him even though you’ve seen me do it for so long. We’re building out what we want our mornings to look like. In order to get to your ideal morning, you have to get to bed on time.
Transforming Evening Habits
We’ve had to create different habits in the evening. This meant to really change not only habits but also our addictions. While habits are things I believe are somewhat easier to change, they can still be quite challenging to break. I think part of it is the need to unwind and have some completely intentional downtime, where you have nothing to do, which feels really good after a long day of having so much to do.
So, we’ve recently discussed the idea of peeling back a couple of days a week and considering what we want our bedtime routine to be like. Going back to strategically setting up date nights and making that time together a little bit more intentional. We were never on the couch with our phones, except when we needed to look something up quickly; then we’d grab them. The time we spent together on the couch was truly dedicated to the two of us. However, we still found ourselves going to bed very late.
Overcoming Bedtime Routine Inconsistencies for Moms
Every once in a while, I was able to do my bedtime routine the way I wanted, but it just wasn’t happening consistently. There are a couple of things that I let go, which I’ll discuss here. I believe that addressing these issues will not only help me get back into the super addictive cycle of how I want my bedtime routine to look. I think it’s going to help you as well.
Creating the Right Bedtime Environment
When you’re trying to build or break a habit, one of the most important things you can do is structure and create your space. It has to be right at your fingertips, incredibly simple, and immediate. Our conditioning has made us accustomed to immediate gratification, especially when it involves our phones. Therefore, if your phone is anywhere nearby, which is one of the things I exclude, it’ll be very challenging to stick to your goal. You need to find a space that is as far away from your phone as possible.
“When you’re trying to build or break a habit, one of the most important things you can do is structure and create your space.”
Bedtime Environment and Electronic Devices
I’m working hard to remove all of our electronics from the upstairs and relocate them downstairs. This way, we can have an upstairs sanctuary for everyone, especially since it’s where we sleep. It’s the place where we should come together and have intimate conversations, although they can also happen elsewhere in the house. However, we understand that as soon as we bring our phones close to us, they’ll distract and pull us in. So, they cannot be in this space, right?
Consistently Achieving Better Sleep With Your Bedtime Routine for Moms
What we’re aiming for right now is to consistently get better sleep so that your day can go the way that you want to. It all begins with your bedtime routine as a mom. Even if you have just five, ten, or even fifteen minutes, which is fantastic, you can accomplish a lot in fifteen minutes, or even more in thirty. You can make a significant impact with just five minutes without your phone before getting into bed.
Flexible Bedtime Routine Options Based on Your Schedule as a Mom
I’m going to provide you with three options. I don’t always get to all three of these every night. Each one provides you with an opportunity to unwind and introspect. I love it when I can incorporate all three into my night routine. Having all three options available allows me to adapt based on the time I have available.
If I have just five minutes, I’ll choose one. With fifteen minutes, I’ll do two. If I have thirty minutes, I’ll do all three. It’s flexible and changes depending on my day and week, but I always have these choices to turn to. They motivate me to leave downstairs and head upstairs earlier. This allows me to engage in these very specific activities. I know they help me relax and get into bed when I want to. Having this kind of sleep is crucial for me because I need it in order to effectively manage the kids, the house, the business, and all the other responsibilities.
Bedtime Routine Space #1 for Moms – Your Vanity
Here are five key items you should have on your vanity or in the space near your sink. At the end of the night, I recommend setting aside five to 10 minutes to complete these specific things.
Hair Clip and Spa Hairband
Keep a hair clip and spa hairband at your vanity for when you wash your face. These are the fluffy spa headbands.
Makeup Remover Towels and an Exfoliator
Number two is to have makeup remover towels and an exfoliator. I use the reusable ones. We have a little bin underneath the sink that Blaine’s wash rags go into after he has shaved his face and mine after I’ve washed my face. We just do that laundry instead of buying disposable makeup removers. I also have an exfoliator towel. I love a good manual exfoliator. You could use a handheld like the ones that have the spinning brushes or a cream or scrub. Exfoliating makes me go from feeling like I am the 40 year old woman that I am all the way back into maybe my 30s. It’s amazing!
Face Wash, Toner, Essential Oils and Gua Sha
Number three is to have a face wash toner, essential oils, and gua sha. You could use a moisturizer but I choose to use really deep hydrating oils which I get from doTERRA. I love it. I use the Yarrow POM. It is amazing and I’m obsessed with it. You can check out what I use inside of this guide that you can download for free. You can also get access to purchase those there as well.
Lip Scrub and Lip Balm Treatment
Number four is lip scrub and lip balm treatment and I highly recommended it.
Elevated Tooth Care
And number five is elevated tooth care. I’m obsessed with my toothpaste, flossers, mouthwash and oil pulling. If you’re not weird and crunchy like me, you may need to Google what that is. But the OnGuard toothpaste that I use from doTERRA is my favorite. I’ve tried about 40 different kinds and have even made my own. This is by far my favorite.
Whenever I can get all of these things done in five to 10 minutes I feel so refreshed. I’m working hard to get this done every single day. An incredible part of any bedtime routine for moms is what you have set up on your vanity.
Bedtime Routine Space #2 for Moms: Your Closet
The number two area or space that you should set up in your bedroom to help create that really addictive juicy bedtime routine is your closet. It is really amazing when you have that space completely clean.
Have a Clean, Organized Space
Get your closet to where you don’t have clothes all over the place.
Number two is to have a hamper that is set up and ready to receive all your dirty clothes. So when you come in at the end of the day and you’re ready to get dressed in your pajamas, there’s nothing worse than just throwing them in the corner. That is not how you want to end your day. Have a laundry hamper ready to receive it. It shouldn’t be overflowing and bursting at the seams.
Number three, some pajamas that are cute and comfy will go a really long way. Do you have a matching pajama set? Why do we buy matching pajamas for our kids, but then we wear the ratty stuff that we’ve had for years. Maybe it’s comfortable. But I went all out on a limb and I bought myself a pajama set. It makes me excited to go get into them and then get into bed.
Make sure that you have underwear that are not as old as your oldest child. How nice it is to have underwear that you have not been wearing for a decade? You have them and you know them well! Throw them away and get yourself some new underwear. It’s like a luxury for us to buy ourselves new underwear. If you haven’t done this, then you’re in for a treat. And if you have gone all out and splurged and gotten yourself new underwear recently, you know how incredible it is. So make sure that you have that set up in your closet.
Space for Tomorrow’s Outfits
And then last but certainly not least is a space for tomorrow’s outfits. I enjoy picking out what I’m going to wear the next day. Now, you may not have the same kind of relationship with your body, your body image, how you feel and how you look in your clothes. If you don’t, and if that’s what you’re feeling right now, it’s okay to skip this. But make this a goal for yourself, maybe towards the end of the year or for next year. Get acquainted with what clothes are in your closet. Make sure that you have a clean and tidy closet. Get rid of the things that you don’t wear. Keep only what you love. If you don’t love anything right now, set some money aside and your budget and make that happen.
I used to make it happen by thrifting. And then I realized that Walmart was cheaper than thrifting these days. Slowly but surely over time, I’ve realized that I would rather have three incredible articles of clothing that cost me a lot more money than having 14 of them from Walmart. So I’ve been making that shift and mixing and matching over the last six years. So these things that happen in my closet every night really do encourage me. They draw me in. They make me excited to end my day and look forward to getting a good night’s rest so that I can wake up to a new day tomorrow.
Bedtime Routine Space #3 for Moms – Nightstand
This is the number one thing if you don’t do anything at all. These are all fun and exciting and are going to give you something to go and work on in your house right now with some fresh ideas. Making a few simple changes in your house can have a great impact on you. The third space is Your nightstand. I actually have another post focused on your nightstand which looks at what you should have on your nightstand for a successful 5 minute bedtime routine. That is a deep dive of what I’m going to touch on right now. I’m bringing this content in here because it really is a game changer and vital for your nighttime routine.
A Place for Rings and Bobby Pins
A tiny dish for you to just drop the things you forgot to take off in. Every night I get into bed and there’s a hair tie, bobby pin, ring or earrings there and I don’t want to have to get up. So I love having a little dish there on my nightstand to be able to put everything in.
Diffuser and Oil Rollers
Next is a diffuser and favorite rollers for nighttime and morning when you wake up. One of the things I look forward to the most are those 5 minutes I spend sitting on the edge of my bed with my nightstand drawer open and going through these things. Taking off my ring, sitting down and being quiet for a minute before I tuck into bed without my phone. Having my diffuser going with my oils and a little vessel of water I pour in. I pick my favorite oils and pop it into sleep mode and it runs well into the night. My rollers are amazing. I can roll them onto my feet or anywhere and it helps calm and soothe me. You can also make a pillow mist or spray which is really awesome.
Make sure you have water for yourself. I am always thirsty at some point at the end of the day. There’s a specific water bottle I use and not just any cup as I’m afraid if I reach over in the middle of the night I’m going to tip it over.
Journal or Habit Tracker
Pull out your journal, habit tracker or prayer journal. Something to sit down with and jot some notes in. I have a really fun one a friend gifted me with that has 5 years of really small entries in it so you can write what your kids or family did that day. It’s a really great place to look back. It could be your planner but I don’t like to look forward to the next day. I try to do that earlier in the day. Most of the time it’s to look at what I need to be prepared for the next day, what kind of outfit I need to set out.
I definitely don’t want to be picking up my phone looking at details like that right before I get into bed for two reasons. Firstly because it will probably suck me into something else and ruin that time I want. Secondly it’s going to start my wheels turning and I’m going to get anxious or excited about things or I’m going to worry about something. I prefer thinking about how blessed my day was winding down to rest knowing that tomorrow’s worries and woes and excitement will all be there when I wake up in the morning.
Chapstick, Foot Cream and Hand Lotion
If I didn’t get to my lip scrub and lip treatment in that first part of my bedtime routine then I almost always apply chapstick at this time. I’ll also apply foot cream and hand lotion. Sometimes the lights will be out and I’ll realize I never got to use these and I’ll open my drawer with the lights out because I can literally reach it, pull it out and put it on my feet and hands. I love it so much. I also have these little foot socks that I put on with it. It’s just a lovely part of coming to bed every night.
So those are all 15 of the tiny nuances of what I have placed in my immediate spaces. This ensures that my bedtime routine is enticing, enjoyable, really fun, and a place that I want to go to every single night.
Put Your Bedtime Routine for Moms Into Action
I hope this gives you some really fun ideas and the encouragement and the enthusiasm to go forth and set up some of these spaces in your own house. If you do, snap a picture and post it over inside of our Facebook group, so that we can encourage you and celebrate with you.
Nothing about today’s episode costs you a single dime, you can rearrange things, do a little bit of hard, intentional work, and really make a big change in your day. You’re going to give yourself a big pat on the back and feel really proud and I want to celebrate that with you. So come over into our free Facebook group, share your new vanity, share your little spa headband or your lip scrub, whatever it is that you’re working on over there that you think is going to encourage you in your bedtime routine specially for you mom!
Frequently Asked Questions
I'd love to incorporate these bedtime habits into my routine but I struggle to get to bed on time with everything I'm trying to get done. Do you have any resources that could help me?
Yes, absolutely! You want to start by determining your priorities. Download my fundamental needs workbook to help you set these out. After gaining clarity on your weekly goals, the next step is to effectively incorporate them into your schedule. I recommend utilizing my time-blocking workbook, available for download, to organize your time blocks. For a more guided and detailed approach to this process, consider becoming a part of the Systemize Your Life community.